Is your bariatric surgery life not as easy as you hoped it would be?

Are you trying to do well, but find yourself frustrated?

Everyone has their own areas of bariatric surgery frustration. How many of these scenarios sound like you?

Help! I can’t stop eating sugar and refined carbs. Even if you’ve had a period of time avoiding sugar and refined carbs, you are back to eating them with a vengeance. Not only can you tolerate sweets, you crave them so much you feel driven to eat them — no matter how they affect you.

What? Speak up for myself? I’ll pass. You tend to let others define how you live your life. You put everyone’s needs before your own, and act as if all of their needs are urgent compared to yours. You eat food that is unhealthy for you to please others or to comfort yourself. You will do anything to keep harmony and to avoid disappointing people.

Ouch – that really hurt. You tend to get defensive and hurt when people offer feedback or criticize you, and you allow the opinions of others to determine how you feel about yourself. You eat to ease your pain. You resist anything that makes you feel like you’re being controlled by others, including food journals and exercise commitments.

It’s all their fault! You are surrounded by people who don’t support your bariatric surgery lifestyle. Your co-workers keep bowls of candy on their desks and buy lattes at break time; your best friend always wants to meet you for happy hour, like in the old days; and your spouse often prepares or buys unhealthy foods, and wants you to share them. If they would all change, you’d be okay.

My life is in chaos and I’m too busy to follow a plan. Stress is your middle name, and your food choices show it! You are tired and stretched to your limit. You graze when you don’t have time to cook. You eat a lot of prepared or fast food. You are lucky to get lunch and you are ravenous by dinner time, at which point you munch your way through the evening. Sometimes you even get up in the night to eat. You may even skip taking your vitamins and minerals or drinking your water.

I feel driven to overeat! No matter how you start your day, or what your plan is, you do not make it through the day without overeating or making unhealthy choices. Even when you really don’t want to overeat. You promise yourself you won’t eat a snack before dinner, but then you find yourself hiding in the pantry eating crackers. You tell yourself you don’t want to stop for food on your way home from work, but then you find yourself in the convenience store buying a candy bar or a bag of trial mix.

What makes those situations so painful is that deep down you really want to be successful after bariatric surgery. The fasted way to reach your goals is to find balance, and to develop your well-being mentally, emotionally, psychologically, and socially.

You want to take care of yourself, set loving limits with people, learn to let things roll off your back, get support from your family and friends, live a more balanced life, and feel at peace with your eating.

It may seem like you’re taking care of yourself, because you’re trying to get your needs met. You’re trying. But your approach often leaves you feeling physically drained, emotionally depleted, and frustrated. Not to mention guilty and ashamed.

The good news is it’s never too late to set a new course on your bariatric surgery journey. Your old approaches to weight loss have not worked well for you, but you can change your old beliefs and unhealthy behaviors.

Yes, with enough of the right kind of support and information, you can! Now is always the perfect time to start over. Instead of longing for things to change as you keep living the same patterns, consider there is another way. Keep an open mind. And never give up.

Now that you’re here, grab a cup of tea (or whatever you like) and explore:

Is this you?